


Unsteady

by A Small World (Datawolf39)



Series: A Little Thief of Hearts [1]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: Child Neglect, Coping, Gen, Start of age regression, Told in Snippets, headcannon: Akira's mom and dad are dismissive of him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-11
Updated: 2019-05-11
Packaged: 2020-02-29 02:13:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18769093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Datawolf39/pseuds/A%20Small%20World
Summary: A story told in snippets. Akira before the events of the Little Thief story. Title is from the song Unsteady by the X Ambassadors, it was the inspiration for this.





	Unsteady

**Author's Note:**

> This is for the people who suggested I continue. This is more of a small history to set up for a very vulnerable Akira.

Akira has always been quiet. Part of it is his nature, he likes to watch, and when looking, silence is the only way to assure whatever you are watching will not get disturbed. The other part is certainly is nurture, his parents are not mean, they provide him with everything he needs, he has never known what it was to go hungry, he had plenty of clothes that fit, they simply are not the most tactile.

~

Akira is six years old when he notices a large difference between himself, and the other children, he has had inklings, of course, feelings of this _something_ , but school concentrates his exposure, and allows him to identify this _thing_. It truly becomes clear to him when he sees others picked up by older siblings, and or parents, and he was left to walk home by himself. Words like ‘self-sufficient’ and, ‘independent’, were always thrown around when others were talking about him, and he starts to see them for what that they really mean, which is, 'alone'.

It’s not as though he sets out to be alone, he simply ends up that way. Home is a very quiet place, and he comes to like the quiet, and seeks it at school. His teachers ask him if he is lonely, and his only reply is the truth. “I’m alone at home a lot, so I’m used to it.” He has no idea how bad that is until he is much older.

~

Sometimes when he is home alone he thinks about how good his parents are good at their jobs, they must be, after all, they spend most of their time there and neither of them has changed jobs since he has been able to remember. Sometimes, when he has had a bad day, he wishes they were as good at being parents as they were at working.

~

When he is in middle school, and they learn about procreation, he wonders if he was not planned. Having a plan made things easier, and if he was not planned on, that would explain why his parents weren't able to make time for him.

By this point, he is aware that his relationship with his parents is not the same as most of his peers. He often hears them complaining about how nosy their parents are, and all the rules they have to follow, he tries to pretend that he knows what that is like.

Sometimes, for a little while, he manages to fool himself.

~

One day, walking home from school, he sees a woman and her baby. He sees her gentle love, and hears the baby's happy responses. Did his parents ever do that when he was small? Was he a happy baby? He wonders what it would be like, what it would _feel_ like, to be cared for in that way; to be loved like that.

He locks his door that night, and allows himself to pretend, to imagine someone is caring for him. His parents are out, just as they normally are, so for once, he allows himself to be loud. He cries, screams, and throws a few of his toys. He imagines someone coming to him, holding and calming him, telling him to apologize for being rough with his stuffies, and he loves it. Every moment is like something from a dream, and an hour later he falls asleep with a smile.

~

In high school, he wants be seen differently, he joins a club to connect with his schoolmates, tries to change that quietness that has defined him since childhood. He puts aside his way of coping, and tries to stand out academically, and otherwise.

One day, after a late practice, he sees a woman, hears her crying for help, and every instinct tells him to run, to go home, to ignore her cries, but he is trying to change. So far he has met limited success, but this could be the moment that he becomes more than he is. So he runs to her, and that is the moment that everything changes.

**Author's Note:**

> The next story will deal with the group dynamics and have more Little Akira, hopefully it will be longer. Also feel free to comment with ideas for things you would like to see.


End file.
